Monday, December 12, 2011

Can't smile without you

Taken 3 days before the accident.
It's hard to really smile from the heart now.

I got this small, vintage and cute 'aunty' bag 2 weeks ago with her during one of our shopping trip.

Even Roven is gloomy.
He kept lying near the door, waiting for someone to return even though all of us are already back home (excluding Adel).

Skipped his meals so we had to buy him a toy to try and cheer him up.

15 more days to your birthday.

Do not click read more if you are going to judge me/my family again.
I wish that you can see for yourself, how everyone in the family is grieving for you.

Why must it be so sudden?
We didn't even manage to hear you say some last words in the hospital.

I begged for the doctor to not stop the resuscitation.
Dad wanted to help you pump the air thingy until you wake up.
We pleaded with him not to stop.

But he closed his eyes and told us that you're gone.
Doctor had to pull me away with some strength.

Images of you on the bed in A&E and coffin kept flashing through my mind.

I. Still. Can't. Get. Over. This.
Never had, and never will.

How can I lose a sister this way?

Can anyone understand?